“If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always come to me.” “I am always here for you if you need to talk.” “I am your friend and will always be here for you.”
I imagine everyone has heard those quotes, or at least something close to them. Our lives can get difficult. Things come up. Things happen. We find ourselves stressed out, or sad, or angry, or who knows what it is. We find ourselves in those times when our friends and or family remind us they are here for us. They remind us they are willing to listen if we need someone to talk to.
Knowing we have someone to talk to can make a world of difference. It can make a difference to go and talk to a complete stranger (such as a therapist or priest). It can make a difference to find a group of people who have been through something the same (such as addicts do in support groups).
Sometimes, though, we want one specific person or group to listen. I find this to be most common when it comes to relationships. In a marriage, a person’s friends can listen to the frustrations of the marriage, but it is the spouse who we really want to know about those frustrations. Or maybe it is the fiance, or the boyfriend/girlfriend. The point isn’t the specific relationship, the point is the specific person.
It can carry past a relationship too. If a relationship ends badly, and you are left feeling as though the other person did not listen to you, did not give your thoughts and feelings the credit you believe they deserve. It leaves you wanting to find a way to make that person listen. Friends can listen, new lovers can listen, family can listen, but that one person is the one you want to listen to you. It is difficult to face the prospect that the one person you really need to hear you won’t listen.
It was difficult as a teenager when parents decreed how things would be and the voice of frustration rang through my head and I just needed to be heard. It was difficult as an adult when another adult decided to just run away and never give my thoughts or feelings a voice.
Dealing with such thoughts and feelings is not an easy task. It is possible though.
Sometimes you need someone to listen to you. Sometimes you need one specific person to listen. For if they would listen, then you could deal with the frustrations, and you could relieve the stress within your own mind.
The comments box is open if you want to share your story of needing someone to listen.